I am SO happy that Kim got #WEverb11 rolling this year. When I opened the email from Gwen saying that there wasn't going to be a #reverb11, my first thought was, huh, I enjoyed some of the prompts from last year, and I really enjoyed some of the posts that I ended up writing. But I guess if it's not happening this year, that's ok. Maybe I'll reflect a bit on my own? Or maybe not...
Because as much as I like to think that I would have written some reflection posts this next month, I probably wouldn't have. Because life is busy. And things happen. And my blogging has sort of fallen off a bit and I'm not entirely certain why. Life feels a little bit adrift right now, and I'm not really sure why that is either. But maybe by looking back at this last year and thinking ahead to the future I can re-center myself? It's worth a shot anyway.
I looked back at last year's post (since the prompt was the same in the spirit of where this started), and was intrigued to see my choices of words. My word for 2010: Change. My word for 2011: Passion. Change was right on. Passion was maybe less so. I don't think that I would necessarily have described 2011 as a passionate year, however, when I look back I am surprised at the passion that was there. First off, our wedding. Second, reigniting my passion for the law (strange how finding yourself in the area of law you wanted to be in makes you want to be a lawyer again!). Third, my passion for my family as a whole - I feel incredibly blessed to be back in a place where I can see my parents on a weekly basis.
So while those words were a good choice for last year me, this year my words are:
2011: Release (I would have used "letting go" but I was trying not to cheat on the first post!). This might seem like it would be the opposite of passion, but I don't think so. It's more the way that I have tried to approach aspects of my life this year. When I was so worried about being unemployed and afraid that I would never find a job, I had to let go and trust that it would happen. And then I had three job offers in three weeks. When I was worried about not getting down to California for Christmas this year, I consciously released my anxiety and that day B found incredibly cheap tickets to California so that we both could celebrate with his family. Freaking out about B's job search and feeling like we'll be treading water forever and never getting ahead? Releasing that worry and telling the universe that we'll figure it out has led to an interview. My life is far from perfect, but for all of those things that I cannot change, I also can no longer hold on to my worries like they're a security blanket. This past year has been an exercise in learning that, and I hope to continue that into 2012.
2012: Growth. I want 2012 to be a year of growth for myself - personally, professionally, our family, all of it. Building upon the foundation that B and I have created for ourselves, and seeing where it takes us. And letting go of the anxiety about the future and embracing it instead.