Sunday, December 5, 2010

Letting Go

What (or whom) did you let go of this year?

I'd like to say I let go of fear.

I took the leap and left a job acting on faith that we'd be ok in our new city until I found another one.

I said yes to B, ending years of wondering within myself about whether I could ever really trust that someone cared about me so much and believed in me as much as I believed in him.

I have done everything in my power to keep our little family afloat through the past year, and we're still here - maybe not yet thriving, but definitely surviving.

But why am I still afraid of what comes next? I don't know how things will turn out and that still worries me. If I don't think about (uh worry excessively over) anything that could happen, how will I be prepared to face it? How will I know what to do? What if I mess it up?

Fear (and worry) has been the single biggest thing holding me back. And while I may have let go of it in some areas, it still rules far too much of my life.

So in 2011 I will continue to let go of fear so that I can do the things I've been too afraid to try. Open myself to experiences and opportunities that I've closed myself off from.

And live.

1 comment:

  1. I struggle with fear/worry, too. It's almost as if worrying about something enough validates it in some weird way.

    I can say that the times I've let go of my fears and doubts, I've surprised myself with the things that I'm able to accomplish (along with the fact that everything always manages to work out).

    Great post!


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