Monday, September 27, 2010

Compromise - you don't always get what you want

... But you might just find you get what you need.

It's really a never ending process isn't it? It's not like you just get to a point in your relationship where you each have it all figured out and know exactly what the other person wants, which of course would be exactly what you want.

Instead, it's a process that you keep refining and fine tuning. And it never, ever ends.

This weekend we moved. And I feel like it's been a weekend (and longer) of compromise. How are we going to pack this? Do we want to keep that? Where should this [insert generic object here] go? And of course, knowing when to hand someone a beer and tell them to sit and watch the football game for a few minutes so they don't decide that throwing everything out is an easier solution than unpacking it and finding it a home.

After moving together three times now, B and I are definitely starting to figure out each others' quirks and what we need to compromise on to make things go more smoothly. For example, I hate packing and moving and just about everything that goes along with it. B knows this about me and so he has to help me keep going once we get into the doldrums of moving - specifically helping me focus on discrete tasks instead of letting me get overwhelmed by the big picture.

As hard as learning to compromise is, I know that we're learning important things about each other that we'll need later on. I mean - I would much rather us figure out some of these quirks now instead of down the road when, for example, we're trying to figure out how we want to raise our kids.

But just because deep down I know this is good for us and we're learning more about each other and blah blah blah, it does not make me enjoy moving (and now unpacking) anymore. Time to ice my back and unpack some more boxes...
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